still in copeland, coping

i wanted you to be happy and i wanted this to happen. even if i never wanted this to happen it will come sooner or later and i shouldn't act all mooshy and and mope around and stuff cause this really sucks but it really is hard. worst of all, my boyfriend has every right to be pissed off at me at the moment but he isn't. he just isn't. which leads me to even more guilt.