happy birthday marco

soooo, continuing my post yesterday.

I have just graduated from one of the suckiest major you could afford to have. honestly, i regret how my parents let me make my own decisions. again i say, i was 18 at that time. how should i know which is the right decision, i mean the choice will affect my whole life. i don't get how you're supposed to make a decision sooooo big at the age of 18. honestly, i'm not much of a rebel, and i was pretty clueless back then, i didn't think i would object if they made me take another major. but well, what's done is done. it was my fault too for not looking things up more. but again, how should i know. 4 years in college and i've just learned that it's THIS tough to get a job and earn a decent living.

in a nutshell, i don't think i have the skill to apply for a job in my area, but if i apply for a job in another area i will lose to people who actually majored in things related to that job.
i feel that i will never in a million years get a decent-paying job if i only rely on the degree that i have now. so i feel the need to have a masters degree, BUT in order to obtain that, i will need at least 2 years of experience.

sooooo, i am kind of stuck between a loop here. i need a job, but i will need a better degree for one. to get a degree, i will need a job first.

well, there are a lot of degrees that don't require work experience, but what worries me the most is that i can't afford to pay for a masters degree and i don't have what it takes to earn a scholarship.

so right now i am stuck as stuck as i can get. seriously. there is nothing much i can do really.

i'm i can't just stand here and cry over spilt milk, i have thought of a few things to make things right. i hope you don't mind me sharing them here.
1. i'd like to go to china and study business chinese for a year. i will go back, try to find a job and work there for 2 years, see what comes up from my job.
2. i'd like to go to china and study business chinese for a year and then i will apply to a pre-master at UK and then apply for a masters degree.

either path i take. i hope to god it's the right decision

Didn't think it was going to be this terrifying

I'm not bright, my grades are so so, my degree is very vague and won't bring me anywhere. I have no work experience, i've applied to lots of companies and none have called me back, i dont have any confidence that i will get to any worthy graduate school. I am so not ready to face the world and i'm wondering whether or not i ever will be.