still figuring out life

turns out my plan to get a job and move out as soon as i graduate has to be postponed. my parents really want me to continue my studies. i thought about it and i guess getting a postgraduate degree is probably the best decision. but, again with the money. i so do not want to keep living of their money until i'm 24. no way in hell. so i have to do the one and only thing i can, get a scholarship. but the problem is, can I? i don't know how hard it is to get one. but let alone the scholarship, i don't even know what major i'm going to choose gaarrrghh. but then again back to the money. i really need to get a scholarship no matter what. i really really desperately do. i have to. but again i state, i'm not that smart. i mean i've been trying to study like heck this holiday but i don't think it's working much. maybe i'm not trying too hard, maybe i'm still not on the right track. but i really really want to naikin IP this semester i really do. even if gw ga bisa naikin, at least i could mertahanin so please dear IP jangan turun no matter what happen dear god.