right now NA NA NA

like i mentioned on my earlier post, monster and sen-sen kept playing this song over and over and turning it up till full volume. i didn't really care about the lyrics back than, i just danced like crazy with the others. one fact i just found out, sen-sen recorded me from the back seat and he's going to upload it on facebook. drat! haha. anyway, i downloaded the song and listened closely to the lyrics. seriously, this is exactly what i've been feeling the last few weeks and this lyric might as well represent my last 20 post. lol. read along, oh and the song is addictive so i suggest you download the song right now NA NA

It's been so long
That I haven't seen your face
I'm trying to be strong
But the strength I have is washing away

It wont be long
Before I get you by my side
And just hold you, tease you, squeeze you
Tell you what's been on my mind

I wanna make up right now, na na
I wanna make up right now, na na
Wish we never broke up right now, na na
We need to link up right now, na na

Boy I know mistakes were made between us two
And we show our eyes that night
Even said somethings weren't true
Why'd you go and haven't seen my boy since then
Why can't it be the way it was?
Cos you were my homie, lover and friend


I can't lie
I miss you much
Watching everyday that goes by
I miss you much
Until I get you back I'm gonna try
Yes I miss you much
You are the apple of my eye
Boy I miss you much


I want you to fly with me
Want you to fly
I miss how you lie with me
Miss how you lie
Just wish you could dine with me
Wish you could dine
One that would grind with me
One that would grind with me

bandung!

ok, finally i am now going to write about my last days of this amazing holidays which i spent in bandung.

so first, i planned to leave with monster, sen2, tisya, willa and ajeng. but it turns out my family was going to bandung as well. so i decided to leave with my family instead. anyways, i got there one day before the others did. i went to unpar and meet up with ajeng. seriously i couldn't stop jumping and being excited about all this cause going to bandung is what i've always wanted to do since college started and i'm finally there. then i met boncel and he was all, 'mbak id!!!!' as far as i can remember(fyi, my memory's bad), i have never seen boncel so excited to see me. he said to text me if i wasn't doing anything but he ended up texting me first asking where i was and he picked me up and introduced me to his friends. it was really nice. before ending up with boncel, i got a chance to meet up with bella and agnes as well. but bella had to attend this meeting and agnes wasn't feeling very well. owh and, i've been introduced to bella's boyfriend! the two are so cute together. hahahahaa. im really happy for bella. happy semingguan btw. lol. oh and if you don't know this, bella used to be my chairmate in highschool. now, her boyfriend's kamar kos is right next to boncels. what are the odds! lol

day 2, i was still sleeping when monster called me and said he was at bandung already. i got ready and all and sen2 called me and told me to hurry up and just meet up. so we all met up at boncel's kosan and we hang out there for quite a while. then we went to bandung supermall and had shitloads of fun even though everything was so norak. then we went to tisya's cousin's house and she was a surgeon and she reminded me of the surgeons in grey's anatomy. lol. then the girls were dropped at ajeng's kosan cause that's where they were staying over. then monster, boncel, sen2 along with me went back to boncel's kosan. but hold those thought of gossiping cause i did not sleep there. i just hang out there for a while until adis picked me up. that was the third day. shitloads of fun. seriously. oh and i forgot to mention. while in the car, sen2 and monster kept playing 2 songs which completely brainwashed me; akon-right now na na na and the killers-human. seriously.... over and over and overrr! the more they say they're bored with it, the more they tune it up till really loud . and we danced like crazy in the car. hahahaha

third day, i only got a chance to visit agnes which by that time was already hospitalized. get well soon agnes! i wanted to meet up with boncel one last time but it was just too complicated cause i had to get home right away and his kosan is pretty far from where i was at that time.

well all in all. i had the greatest time in bandung!

oh and, i can't seem to upload the pictures. zzz

on my way home

Aaah gila2 akhirnya pulang jg. Haha ga sabar gw smp rumah dan nulis semuanya. Kentang soalnya klo nulis sekarang. Ga bisa total. Feelnya ga dpt.

Yanhg sbnrnya lg pgn gw bahas adalah peribahasa yang sering kita dgr tu. Hidup kaya roda, kadang diatas kadang dibawah. Trus yesus jg pernah bersabda (saaaaaah),'berbahagialah kalian orang2 yang sedang menangis, karena kalian akan tertawa. Tetapi celakalah wahai kalian yang sedang tertawa karena kalian akan menangis.'
Yaaah something like that lah. Gw ga inget persis2 amat. Haha. Yaaa pokoknya intinya abis seneng lo sedih and vice versa.
Masalahnya adalah, kok cepet bgt si berubahnya?????? Kayanya kmrn gw lg seneng bgt tu. Sngnya parah2 sampe kaya gt dan skrg ya kebalikannya. Aaah begooo. Masi pgn seneng. Masi pgn di bandung. Masi pgn maen. Masi pgn ktemu boncel. Masi pgn nyampah. Masi pgn libur(yang ini ga seberapa si, kuliah jg gpp). Masi pgn bebas dr segala tugas2 kuliah.
Huaaaahhh gila2 gw pgn puter blk nyet mumpung belom keluar cipularang.

finally!

udah gw siraaaammmmm!!!!!!!! udah gw flush! lalalalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. sumpah yaaaaaa. jadi kan kecoanya udah agak menjauh gt kan, trus gw pencet flush buttonnya. rusak aja oooyyy. jd gw harus nyiram2 pake gayung berarti gw harus berhadapan dengan kecoa itu agak lebih lama. tai tai tai tai tai. tp whateverrrrr.......... yang penting udah selese! huaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

aaaah ta* dah!

kecoanya dkt bgt lg sm tombol buat ngeflushnya. damn damn. dan skrg gw pasti jayus bgt ni curhat k lo semua ttg kecoa. tp ya gmn??? gw mau ngmng k siapa lg?? sumpah ga lucu bgt besok pagi adis pasti bangun lebih pagi dari gw dan toiletnya blom di flush. aaaaah sumpah knp gw ga pipis aja di td, kan malunya ga seberapa.

anywaaayyysss, biarkanlah itu gw urus besok. maaf ya dis, ampun2 sumpah ampun. gw ga sabar deh pulang dan cerita ttg semua kegiatan gw di bandung!! huaaaaaaaaa. i had shitloads of fun! sumpah2. sumpaaaahhhh. my first day was awesome. my second was way better and there's still tomorrow. i can write it all down now actually. but i want to wait till tomorrow and write everything all at once. huaaaaaaahhh i am having soooo muchhh fuuuuuunnn. fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fffffffffuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

.............

duh ga berani. gmn dong

jam 3 di kosannya adis

dan adis udah tidur laaaah. and me still awake as shit as usual. dan gw barusan lg boker di kamar mandi trus blom gw flush tp gw udah keburu keluar dr kamar mandi gara2 ada kecoa dekettttttt bgt sm gw. itu ya, gw telat nyadar 3 detik aja, udah nemplok k gw kecoanya. aaaaah gmn dong gw ga berani blk k kamar mandi tp kan ga lucu gw ga gw flush dan adisnya duah tidur. my my nasib gw berhadapan dengan kecoa mlm ini. be brave idya, be brave

been blogwalking a lot recently

dan knp semakin banyak blog yg bikin gw jiper.

jason mraz tickets, still

I think that the fact I didn't get my jason mraz ticket is entiry my fault and that i can actually learn a lot of thing from this.
1. I could still try to get it. No, not try, strive.
2. I should accept the fact that I don't always get what I want.

Gosh, I feel much better. But still, I really want the ticket soooooo bad

udah jam 3:57

gw tau gw harus tidur SEKARANG JUGA karena besok gw harus bgn pagi dan ketemu wila trus ke ratuplaza trus bayar buat tiket java jazz sebelom bank tutup karena kesempatan gw cuma besok. nanti giliran gw ga bgn dan ga bayar tiket java jazz trus nyesel2 kaya tiket jason mraz. tp ya gimana???? ga bisa tidurrrr. trus gw abis baca blognya nurul yang nulisin keinginan2 dia. gw juga tulis aaaahhh

klo lulus 4 tahun dengan nilai cemerlang trus bergelut di bidang media dan sukses besar dan semua orang tau nama gw trus gw nerbitin buku trus ujung2nya kerjaan yg nyari gw bukan gw yang nyari kerja, itu kewajiban. 

tapi apa kemauan gw nyet? hahaha. kemauan yang ngayal2 sampah tapi asik juga kalo dijalanin. OIYA! restoran sate padang kan. hahahahahhaah. gw udah pernah cerita kan? gila2 pgn bgt gw punya restoran sate padang jadi gw jg bisa makan sate padang kapan aja gw mau. bodo amat deh, bosen bosen deh. trus gw pgn deh ngajar. ngajar apapun deh, mitologi yunani kek, bahasa cina kek apa kek yang emang udah gw kuasain nanti. trus gw ga sabar nanti klo gw udah jadi tante2, buku2 gw sekarang kan masi ada semua tu, trus gw pinjemin ke keponakan2 gw. jadi pokoknya tiap mereka ke rumah gw mereka minjem buku2 gw hahaha. trus gw pengen bgt bisa tinggal di yunani setauuuun aja. trus gw pgn bgt bisa ngajar di sekolah slb. and last but not least, gw agak2 pgn punya anak banyak nyet. hahahaahahahahahahaaha. aduh gw bahkan geli nulis ini. hahaahhaahahahahahaah. emg si masa gw ga ikut kb or apalah apalah. tapi ya gmn, gw pgn. haha

hahaha yaudah si itu aja si. dan itu ga ngayal2 bgt juga si. masi dalam itungan wajar. hahaha.

tiket jason mraz

gw masi berusaha buat ngedapetin tiket jason mraz. tapi udah beda sama tadi. kalo tadi pas tau kalo tiketnya abis gw bnr2 panik dan satu2nya insting gw yg masi jalan adalah cari cari cari. gw nelfonin hampir semua tempat yg ada di tiket box dan gw kaget pas tau bahkan di grand indonesia, gading, margo city, puri indah mall sama cibubur junctionpun abis. haha. gw bahkan sampe kepikiran mau ntn yg di singapore(bad bad habit) dan yg menurut gw paling gila tu pas gw sampe nelfon ke makasar, jogja sama surabaya dan mau beli tiketnya kesana. hahaaaaaa. well intinya, i wasn't thinking clearly. gw bnr2 udah segala sumpah serapah sampe2 gw blg gw ga peduli klo gw ga bisa ntn another concert again in my life asal gw bisa ntn ini. soalnya this is what i've been waiting for! persetan maroon5 sm the academy is... nyet. gw mendingan ntn jason mraz klo disuruh milih salah satu. gw bahkan sampe bilang keabisan tiket rasanya lebih ga enak drpd waktu putus. hahaaaaaaa

well, intinya, i wasn't thinking clearly. gw lupa. gw lupa satu hal yang akhir2 ini berusaha gw terapkan dalam hidup gw. sabar sabar sabar. gw ga tau kenapa tapi kayanya semua disekitar gw menuntut gw untuk sabar. akhir2nya gw udah tenang dan sabar, gw mikir satu2nya cara yaaaa tetep nyari dan menunggu mukjizat terjadi. mukjizat yang lebih wah drpd tempe mendoan di kampus gw hahaaa(sumpah ga penting abis). akhirnya yaudah, pm gw dan status gw di facebook menyatakan betapa pengennya gw punya tiket jason mraz dan plis gw mau beli kalo emg ada. ini emang salah gw. gw ga langsung beli pas pertama tau. biasanya gw tu ga nunggu lho. langsung beli ga mikir. tp ini gw molor2 dan nggampangin. anyway, setelah gw so-called sabar, 2 temen gw, putwei sm gabriel manggil di msn dan bilang mereka punya tmn yang ngejual. mereka ga janji masi ada, tp mereka bisa nanyain dan ngabarin gw besok. jadi gw skrg bersabar menunggu hari esok and just in case the worst case scenario happens tomorrow, please, kalo ada yg punya tiket spare, kabarin gw ya. thk u!

anyway, i'm going to bandung!!! and this time, it's 100% officially jadi! can't wait to see you all!!!!!!! aaaah parah2 hihihihiii.

oiya, again, buat yang punya tiket jason mraz lebih apa tau dimana gw bisa ngedapetinnya, plis plis, kabarin ya.

thank you!

an-j*ng

gw bahkan terlalu kaget untuk bereaksi menanggapi berita klo tiket jason mraz abis. sumpah2 satu2nya yg mau gw lakuin skrg cuma nyariiiiiiii!!!

blogwalking

a few days ago, i came across a friend's blog. check it out here. her name's hanny and she's in the same major as i am and i use to share a class with her last semester. honestly, i found out so much about her in her blog which i think is really interesting. one of the many things is that she's a grey's anatomy fan! finally someone who understand's the grey language at campus. lol. another thing is that her english is freakishly awesome. there are also a few sentences in her blog which really struck me and changed my way of thinking. here's the first:

to me, holidays are filled with tears for the lost ones and pressure of having to have something to do on holidays are high.

yes yes yes! if you've been following my blog, you'll probably remember how i wrote about me not being productive and that i have to do something useful rather than moan about my ex which is actually not going to get me anywhere.

cause on non-holiday days, you are productive no matter how little. so the pressure of having something to do isn't that high. while in holidays, you pretty much have nothing to do which makes you end up thinking about things which you usually have no time to think about since you are to busy with your daily life. so yeah, no wonder the suicide rates on holidays are effing high.

the second sentence is:

 i am always honest to myself. cos you cant always be honest to other people, so you gotta always be honest to yourself. i swear it’s the only way and the best way to keep you sane.

oh gosh, i love this one. seriously, if you think about it, how often do you hide things from yourself. it's true though, you can never be truly honest to others, so the only person you can be honest to is yourself.

haha ok, you go hanny! haha

books you SERIOUSLY have to read

 SOPHIE'S WORLD: a book about the history of philosophy

author: jostein gaarder

the books starts off with 14 year old sophie who received a letter from an anonymous sender teaching her about philosophy. the lesson of the philosophy is just amazing and sophie also has a story of her own. the mixture of sophie's mysterious life and philosophy makes one amazing story line. gaarder surely knows how to make philosophy interesting. no matter how old you are, you will connect with sophie's feeling the first time she was introduced to philosophy. i think this is a bok EVERYONE in the world should read. if someone only had a chance to read one book in the life, this should be the book and no other (sorry quran and bible). even if you don't end up to be a fan of philosophy, i think at least everyone should know the basics.

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD

author: harper lee

based on a real event that happened in lee's hometown, this book is surely a must read for everyone, esp to be lawyers. atticus finch is one character that could really move you, for he stands up to what he believes and having the patience to handle how others treat him. helping a nigger in the sixties were considered a shameful act. what makes this book even more interesting is that it is told by the 6 year old jean louise 'scout' finch. lee also adds characters which kind of derives from the storyline like boo radley and dill.

THE CURIOUS INCIDENT OF THE DOG THAT HAPPENED IN THE NIGHT TIME

author: mark haddon

a genius work from haddon. i still get reminded of christopher until now whenever i see things which are related to the book even though it's been 5 years since i read the book. reading a story from the eyes of a child suffering asperger syndrome, you will never see the world the same again. how he pictures jokes and the way he sees things, it's so different yet somehow alike to how we think. all in all, christopher is one character that is sure to be loved by all who has read the book.

PERGOLAKAN PEMIKIRAN ISLAM

author: Ahmad Wahib

probably one of the best books i have ever lay my hands on. wahib's way of thinking is just bizarrely amazing and i agree with his every word. while at the same time, his every word could act like spear towards the muslim society. 

happy niu year. haha

新年快乐， 恭喜发财

(gile2 cina bgt. haha)

anyways, gong xi fa cai da jia! itu bacanya fu yg artinya prosperity and happiness. dan itu tulisannya kebalik. gw dikasi tau adip. katanya dipasangnya kebalik biar hokkienya turun. hahaha. 

happy niu year! (lagi)

FUN!

i'm not exaggerating, but i had a shitload of fun today. i went to senayan city with sen2, monster, ajeng and willa. the four of us(willa documented) joined this really silly race by nokia which we regretted joining at first cause we feel like complete retards playing the game. but we won the first round and it was all fun from there. so the game is played by 4 players per team. 3 people go searching for clues and one person stands in place ready to write down all those clues. the clues are song titles. and once you have all the song titles needed, you make sentences out of those song titles. i think we did a pretty good job. a really good job even, but we failed because I completely skipped and it turns out i didn't write down all the song names. even though my teammates have given them to me. i am sooooooo sorry people. well, i guess it wasn't entirely my fault since the others also didn't realize the clues that they found weren't in the list. but still, i kinda felt guilty. anyway, since we didn't win the grand prize which is a mobile phone for each player, we got gift vouchers for anything by PT. mitra adiperkasa. haha. not bad, not bad AT ALL. then we all got ourselves something from topman. lol. seriously, i was this close to backing out of the race, but i am sooooo glad i didn't! haha

uh oh

the sims3 will be released on february 20th. not good. not good at all. how am i suppose to study properly then?

writing

lately, like what i've written before, my life has been going pretty smooth and i constantly thank god for it. but being given minds as a normal human being, i have to release my thoughts somewhere. realize it or not, we always focus our thoughts somewhere. like when we have a lot of things going on and bugging our mind, that's where our thoughts go. since my life is smooth and a ok and it's the holidays so i don't have to worry about studying as much as i have to on normal school days, i have been realizing quite an amount of unnecessary focus on unimportant things like mmmmm my ex.

i mean seriously, come on, move on, that happened months ago and you're just wasting time thinking about nearly impossible chances and other hopeful dreams when i could just be plain productive.

so last night, i decided to focus my energy on other things. other things which are more useful for me. so off my mind goes, wandering off to god knows where until it decided to stop at the memory of me joining and essay writing contest back in high school. back then, i did this essay writing competition and i remembered those 2 hours being given to finish the essay, i had the time of my life. seriously. i chose a topic which really relate to me religiously and philosophically. the topic was 'who am i?' i remember writing it and it was soooo much fun, i put reference from the many books i've read and i ended up winning 3rd place! haha. it wasn't first but at least i won out of all those contestants and the important thing is i had fun whole doing it.

then i remembered karya tulis. since i was sooo addicted to south park and the simpsons at that time, i decided to pick a topic on adult cartoons. how they effect on the watchers and stuff like that cause i feel like south park really does have a really big effect on my life and the way i think. even though i kept being drawn to watch naruto those time, i managed to finish my karya tulis and i was actually happy with the result and i enjoyed writing it. usually, i can't stop once i begin even though it's pretty hard to start. i remember going to my teacher to consult, she always says that it's good and she kept asking me if it was really me who did it or my mum. hahaha. it was me and me alone haha. my mum also got a chance to read it and she said she liked it and if i was serious in writing it i could actually make something of it. well it's pretty obvious why she liked it, it's her area of expertise.

then i remembered my journal. my journal which i have been neglecting for quite a long time now. my journal which on the first page says,'writing has been an important part of my life and always will be.'

intinya, i miss writing!!!!! seriously, my blog may be crappy and all but when i'm in the zone, i really get in the zone. i use to write in my journal all the time and i could go on forever not realizing i've wrote pages and pages. in high school, i've always loved meddling with articles. whether to turn an interview into a text or vice versa or simply making a report. god i miss those days.

from now on, i'm going to make my blog a little more serious. i admit i am not that very god at writing. but i enjoy doing it more than anything.

god it feels good to be productive.

6.11am

And I still can't sleep! Pdhl hari ini gw hampir bgt tidur cpt. Ga tau knp tp td jam 12 ngantuk gt. Ngantuk tp ga pgn tidur. Masi pgn maen2. Trus kata monster makan buah biar ga ngantuk. Yaudah gw makan es buah lg sm makan jeruk. Trus ntn one piece which is sumpah seru bgt. Trus ditinggal monster tidur pdhl biasanya biarpun gw off jam 5 pun dia blom tidur. Jadi yaudah, gw sendiri deh. Bosen deh. Ga ada kerjaan deh. Terlanjur makan buah byk jd ga bisa tidur.trus gw bengong smbl mikir2 kan. Trus gw mikir banyak deh. Trus mikirnya yang makna gt bukan mikir2 bengong2 nyampah kaya biasanya. Besok gw ceritain d gw mikir apa aja. Tp skrg gw mls ngetiknya. Eh trus grey's anatomy makin seru deh. Haha. Trus gw udah lama bgt ga ntn south park deh. Trus gw kmrn ntn the simpsons dan agak kangen deh. Trus gw sbnrnya ga sabar mau nulis pikiran2 gw td tp besok aja d. Pokoknya tentang gw dan menulis d. Hahaha. Taiah makin nglantur ni post, parah. Ol lg aja deh. Jam segini biasanya masi ada adip. Haha.zaijian!

luffy luffy luffy!

eh gw hoki abis. gw kan selama ini baca one piece kan, gw ga pernah ntn. trus gw pgn ntn tp gw ga tau yg terakhir gw baca itu episode brp. akhirnya gw kira2 aja kan, ga berharap lgsg bener. eh taunya yg gw pilih bnr. hahahaahaa. asik2.

penting abis. hahahahaa

andy warhol

i just thought of this really great joke and i'd love to publish it somewhere. the thing is, if it was written, it would be way too offensive. but if made a comic strip, i probably could get away with it. well, maybe not. but my chances are bigger. so, yeah. warhol's right, art is what you can get away with. i know writing is a form of art, but it's different. it's usually straightforward unlike art which pretty much hides the meaning yet blatantly showing it at the same time

f.oo.d

today, i don't know why exactly, i didn't feel like staying up that late. but there are always things that seems to be constantly ready to me stay up late. lol. fyi, yesterday, i couldn't sleep until it was somewhere around 7 in the morning. from 00.00 to that 7.00 am i keep eating anything i could find in my kitchen; es buah, oreos, corned beef, chocolate cake(which turned out to be out of date), cheese, nastar and still managed to have a glass of milk. so yeah my snacking habit is way out of control but honestly, i don't really mind. i mean, i thought i was getting heavier and stuff but my weight has stayed exactly the same no matter how much i eat. and even if it adds up, honestly, i won't mind. well, health is another thing, but all those snack i've been eating are healthy food anyway. except for the out of date chocolate cake which would still be unhealthy even if it was still  in it's edible days.

but all this long holiday, there are only two kinds of food i've been eating apart from midnight snacks. those two are homemade food and food from restaurants which are most of the time, western food. god damn it, i am so sick, SO SICK of chugging down western food. i even just realized that today i ate TWO hamburgers and TWO sets of fries. seriously? i am sick of that greasy, fried food taste. and i keep getting lasagnas sent to my house by my grandma assuming that i like them. i mean lasagnas are ok, but i'm never a big fan of them. i prefer spaghettis. when i have nothing to eat at home, i end up eating those lasagnas which are now stacked in my fridge. even if there are other food to eat, i still have the responsibility to eat all those lasagnas cause i can't imagine them going to waste.

so really, i am getting myself some es teler 77 tomorrow. wajib, harus, ga boleh ga. and if i can't make it to es teler 77, i'd just buy some noodles near my house or whatever. and i miss sate padang too. i miss eating tempe mendoan which i think is one miracle of a food. and i miss bubur, and i miss all those indonesian junk food. aaarrrgghhh

by now, you are probably going, ya kenapa ga beli aja si id? susah amat? hahahaha. well, because first of all, gw mls keluar rumah buat nyari. and second of all, when i go out, people tend to choose western food and since i'm pretty much hungry already and not in the mood to search for those gloriously tasty indonesian food,  i ended up eating western food making myself too full to even have dessert, let alone eastern food. oh and, third, gw tiap hari bgn jam 5 gt, udah mls keluar rmh juga buat nyari makan, jadi ya makan yg ada aja which are usually lasagna. hahaaaa.

gila2 gw kangen KanSas nyet!!!!!! paraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh

congrats obama!

but don't you think that people's expectation towards obama are a little too high?

sayings

btw, i changed my blog title to I Dare You All cause i feel that's what IDYA stands for. hahaa. and it's to kind of relive the saying do one thing everyday that scares you. 

in my 18 years of life on planet earth, i've heard a lot of sayings and a lot of them really struck me. but the only one that i think will actually have a real effect is that do one thing everyday that scares you. they're not talking about how you should go bungee jumping and skydiving or something like that, even though that is sometimes included. they're talking about things that you've been wanting to do but just not having the guts to do it. imagine if you actually do those things. imagine how far that can get you. but the thing is, it's really hard to relive this saying. i mean, doing what you're afraid of? seriously? everyday??? normal people tend to avoid their fear. but here, we kinda have to face them. and again, everyday. 

there are quite a few things i have in mind actually. but never having the guts to do it like telling my family that i have chosen to be religionless, so far, only one can accept that fact. and like actually showing someone my writing. no, not the junk i write in my blog. not those little stories about teens that i sometimes post. it's nothing like that. far from it. and there are a gazillion more things i'd love to do but afraid to. ooh like asking my mum how to read the news properly. hahahahaaha.

so i would really love to relive that saying. but, it's just too hard. waaaaaaaayyyy too hard. way way way. even those little things like learning to drive gets really hard sometimes. sigh

akhirnya ip gw udah keluar

dan sumpah, ip gw jelek SAMPAH.

so i've been wanting to work at aksara sooooo baadd. like more than anything. but my parents won't let me cause they think it'll disturb my study or whatever. well honestly i can understand that they feel that way cause it will probably disturb my studying but i have friends who work at starbucks, 707 and aksara and they survived. so what i'm going to do is, i will tell my parents that if my ip is more than 3,5 next semester, i get to apply. doesn't mean i'll get accepted, but at least i applied. and if the next semester my ip falls, i will quit.

hahaaa. by now you're all probably thinking. ih susah bgt, mana bisa. iya emg2 tp i really want this and i'll strive to get it no matter what. jadi sekarang gw mau off dan BELAJAR karena belakangan ini gw keasikan baca one piece dan ga belajar. hahaha.

eh iya, one piece seru deh. but so far, i still prefer naruto. lol

so i guess,

it's still my choice.

past midnight, with 4 slices of pizza

DRAT!

she grabbed some charcoal which were to be lying on her table and strikes it across her lilac wall. being an art student, she's supposed to be releasing her anger to art. but her charcoal drawing earlier looks pretty much like crap. she threw her charcoal back to the table not bothering the fact that some managed to hit the wall and scatter all over the floor. she crouched down on the floor, hugging her knees and just stare at the line of charcoal she just made across her wall. it was messy, but it was a line. it reminds her of the horizon. horizon. weird thing if you think about it. it's always in front of you, yet you can never get there. but at the same time. you're always standing on one. it's like..... like nothing she never knew off. seriously, god knows.

she headed towards the front door slamming her bedroom door behind her. stuffing her feet in her worn out uggs. girls nowadays are wearing prettier boots, the fuck should she care. she managed to grab her camel ultra lights before grabbing her coat on the hanger and unlocking the front door.

darn freezing outside, but nothings stopping her. she just wants to go somewhere where she can think about nothing. cause things she avoids just keep coming back to her. 

haha crap, masi panjang tp gw lg ga mood. ini aja mls gw baca ulang. hahaha

i want...

gw pgn pinter

gw pgn ip gw diatas 3,5

gw pgn sukses

gw pgn bgt kerja di aksara

gw pgn baca semua buku yang mau gw baca

gw pgn ke yunani

gw pgn make a difference

gw pgn ngerasain 3 bulanan

gw pgn ngerasain balikan

gw pgn makan gulali lg

gw pgn rak buku gw digedein

well, those are the things that i really want right now. haha

kaya ajeng

so you find the answer to these by searching on google image.

bad habit:

name of my love:
hahahahahaha. hey, he makes me laugh!

a nickname i have:

a city i once lived in:
canberra-australia

the city i was born in:

favorite colour:

favorite food:
sumpah gw ngiler bgt pas ngesearch. haha

favorite place:
kansas--kantin sastra. kangen! udah sebulan lebih ga kesana

place i'd love to visit:
greece!!!

my age on my next birthday:

untung gw sekarang ga umur 12 tahun. hahahahaha

favorite thing:

books. more than anything

tag tag tag tag tag! now go!

hahaha

so i guess....

It's time for me to write the truth. All this time people have been getting the wrong impression. I don't blame them for asking me straightforward why I decided to mmmm breakup. Well, sometimes, sometimes, it kinda kills me to hear it. Haha.
Cause I never wanted the relationship to end. Ever. But things were getting too much and to make a long story short, I don't ever want to be with someone who doesn't want me--anymore.
Ouch, it even hurts to write that. But he is the nicest guy i know and it's not because of something that i could blame him for. It's not cause other girls and it's nothing of the sort.
So I had to accept the fact that the relationship was over. Done. In ashes. Whatever. I could force it to continue, but that is just not wise and not fair to the both of us.
Lately, I heard, he is trying to patch things up. I appreciate it and I'd love to accept it. But since we used to be a couple, we have things we only keep to each other and haven't told any other soul. This is also one of the reasons we ended things. We wouldn't want to strike up another relationship if we both knew it wouldn't work. This thing between us, I know my own strength and I know I would never be able to handle it. NO, it's not religion, it's not race, it's something bigger. So us much as I'd love to spend more of my years with you, I decided not to. And I know you're wise enough to make the same decision.
Hey, status isn't everything anyway. Doesn't mean we can still care for each other.

but hell, do i still miss you. haha

kenny rogers

So here I am at kenny rogers pacific place. Last time I was here It was with ajeng and dita and someone really special texted me. Haha. Once I got home, we talked the night--and morning away. Gosh I miss those times! And I hate the fact that I keep getting these flush of memories wherever I go.
Gggggrrrrrrr

so maybe....

i acted a little rash that day. not filtering the words i say and not controlling my emotions. i also have to admit what i did was pretty...... hmmmm....... psycho. as much as i'm embarrassed to admit it, it's all true. aaaaah. i've been keeping myself to myself and promising not to run after what i lost like a little lost puppy. i mean it wouldn't be so wrong if i tried to fix everything, it probably wouldn't be that hard. probably. but it's not what i usually do. i always say if someone can't accept who i am, then that someone is not for me. well that was who i am, it's just i sorta let it out all wrong. 

now i'm confused.

padahal ga minum kopi

my insomnia's been taking over lately. i try to sleep early, but i end up not sleeping until 7:00 am. i also usually wake up somewhere around 5:00 pm. gosh, sometimes i feel like that's one big joke, me living a bat life like that. but i can't help it. my university friends made a plan to meet up today and go ice skating. we we're supposed to meet up around 2 but i woke up at 4 and i didn't force myself to come cause i thought it'll be all over. but tomorrow, tomorrow is the last day to pay for my college tuition and the bank is not going to wait up for me. so like it or not i am going to have to force myself to sleep early tonight and wake up early tomorrow.

a few days ago, i did something which later on i figured was pretty stupid. now i end up getting none.

and for a someone out there, i know you won't be reading this but, keep your chin up and be thankful for every single thing that you have right now. everything is going to be fine and i promise you will come out stronger than ever =)

逛老城

haha bnr ga si itu judul gw? haha. gosh it's been ages since i seriously blogged(since when is blogging serious for me? haha) i mean, i use to write like everyday. but lately, i just couldn;t find the mood amidst all this......... joy! hahaha

so someone sent me a message via facebook. a guy named iskandar. he says he's a fan of my dad and when he found my blog, he kept reading till late even though he has to work early morning yesterday. haha. anyway, if you're reading this, thank you! i appreciate it. and thank you to to everyone who's been pumping my visitor counts. whether you're lovers, haters, followers or just happen to pass by my blog. thank you!lol

so today me, ajeng, nurul and laras went to kota. laras and ajeng wanted to try their manual camera. i have, a couple of times, visited fatahillah, but it was always on a school trip. i've never went there with my friends and just walk around fatahillah. all this time i usually go straight inside.

i gotta admit, it was nice. i mean there were a lot of people and they were all interesting in their own way. some were taking shots for their yearbook(yoi dimas beck abis itu org haha), some were taking photo shoots for a magazine. seriously, the model even wear a tutu which was pretty trashy to me. haha. and the foreign tourists who look like actresses from our favorite musical. hahahaa. it was fun, really. and it was the first time i bought those gulali thingies. i usually buy the koalala ones, this is the first time i bought those big ones in naruto plastics. and the sate padang was also really good. 

jeng, ras, nur, maaf ya gara2 gw makan sate padang jd keujanan. i know lo jg pada beli sate padang, tp kan gw duluan. huhu.

oh and, my blackberry's broken. dratttttt

jeng2!

janda abis blog gw. hahaha

surprise!

like i mentioned earlier, i was planning something big. and like what some of you may have already seen on facebook, it's a birthday surprise for boncel.
i managed to gather a gang of droogs here being ajeng, nindi, panji,monster(sumpah parah bgt gw bisa lupa, without him, it wouldn't be possible) and sen2(sumpah i can never thank you guys enough!!!). and i also got his family to play along. haha. (thk u gumulyas! esp kak pam who helped all the way from bandung!)
so i bought a cake and gathered everyone and surprised in his front door. i told his brothers to fetch him but richard said he wouldn't come down. so kak bobby said he kinda have to 'drag' him to the front door. haha. once he came out we started splashing him with sprite, eggs, flour and confetti spray. then we went inside and just talk till around 2.30.
all in all, i'm glad i did what i did. when the idea first pop up, i think it was a little to crazy if i really did it since there are so many buts and it's not going to be easy. it wasn't easy, but it was awesome preparing everything. i didn't feel a burden at all. it felt great cause you know you're going to make someone happy.
and here i present you party pictures! haha


yeah first cake! haha. sumpah rambut gw kenapa bgt deh
BONCEL! hahaha. setelah gw liat2 sumpah jayus bgt tu kue. i should've written happy birthday as well. haha



panitiaaa! hahaha

but the moral of this story is, do whatever you want to do regardless of what happens afterwards. you'll love the process anyway. haha

kuliah kuliah

setelah baca blognya yuni tentang kuliah, gw jg jadi pgn nulis ttg kuliah. haha. sekalian merayakan lewatnya satu semester.

gw kan pertama bgt masuk tu sebulan nyampah gt kan. yang disuruh latian paduslah, yang disuruh mungutin sampah di kampuslah, yang apalah, apalah. yaa gw ngejalanin dengan seneng2 aja si, secara baru msk kuliah ky waaaah dunia baru gt. trus selama sebulan itu satu universitas tu masi digabung. gw ngumpul sm tmn2 smaaa terus. dikit bgt temen dr sma laen. ada sii, tp paling satu dua. trus sebulan itu, gw blom berani naek kereta. haha
mulai belajar, awalnya gw blom punya temen, gw kupu-kupu tiap hr. bnr2 kupu2 dan itu ga penting bgt menurut gw. ga enak pokoknya. trus gw cuma berani naek kereta ac which is jadwalnya berantakan paraaaah dan gw bisa lama bgt nunggu di stasiun. dan gw sering bgttt nyasar. hahahaha. nyasar kw tanah abang, gondangdia, sudirman, bahkan pernah turun di universitas pancasila yang gw kira ui. huahahaha. akhirnya seiring waktu berjalan mulai ketemu temen sama mulai punya obsesi baru: sepeda. hahahaha. sempet tu gw tiap hr naek sepeda. smp jatuh guling2 jg pernah. trus gw jg ikut EDSUI(english debating society ui) wkt gw interview gw antusias bgt, berharap dipilih, pas waktu inauguration jg, eh pas udah masuk beneran setengah2. hahaaa.
gw jg fascinated bgt sm library di kampus gw. perpustakaan di fakultas gw aja gede bgt ditambah ada perpustakaan cina sendiri. hehe. like i once said, my campus's library is one most my most favorite place on earth. lama2 teman semakin membanyak dan gw terlibat ke kegiatan2 yg menurut gw lucu kaya orasi(hahaha) sama futsal. trus ya salah satu yg bikin gw seneng bgt di kampus adalah gw punya tmn2 yg bisa diajak diskusi ttg agama. yg punya interest dalam bidang itu dan punya pandangan masing2. ada yg mirip sm kepercayaan gw, ada yng beda jauh ga ada mirip2nya. haha. tp gw ngehargain semuanya dan gw belajar byk BGT dr situ. trus pelajaran mpk seni. kan wajib tu, gw ga nyesel sama sekali ngambil teater. karena itu fokusnya di teater yunani dan gw jg belajar byk bgttt dr situ. gw bahkan ga pernah cabut apa males masuk kelas.
buat di kelas, gila awalnya gw sempet ga bisa catch up gt. dosen ngajarnya cepet bgt, bener2 lo hrs nyiapin dr rumah sebelom masuk kelas dan lo diminta buat bisa mikir cepet sama aktif. gila sumpah mana gw kan jagonya bengong sm tidur di kelas. haha. tp yaa udah g ada cerita aja bisa ky gt. hahaa. akhirnya lama2 gw tau gw harus ngapain dan apa yg dosen mau. tp agak kelamaan gw nyadarnya and it was agak2 too late. dan beginilah hasilnya. ip gw cantik bgt 2, disaat yg laen 3,
trus gw seneng bgt gw bisa lintas jurusan! gw bisa ngambil pelajaran dr jurusan laen yg gw mau! yg pasti gw ambil tu mitologi yunani, sejarah filsafat yunani sama hmmmm, sementara dua itu dulu d. haha
intinya gw belajar byk bgt nyet. bukan cuma bahasa cina doang. haha. and pengyoumen, wo xiang ni!

oh myyy

i'm planning something big, planning something big. huaaaa

i hope everything goes well. i'll write all about it either way.

hahahha

watching non-stop movies and stand up comedies, reading chapters of one piece, sleeping all day, do anything i want, go wherever i want whenever i want to, go online 24 seven--literally, eat all i want, practice hanzis till morning.

gosh, this is the live. and i still have 3 weeks of it. hahaha

hei heiii

sumpah ya gw baru selese belajar! dr td jam 3 dan skrg jam 4.20. mayan si, masuk banyak. PARAH BGT gw lupa nulis DUANLIAN. zzzzzz. dan gw kan td liat ip gw kan. meskipun cuma ip sementara, ada satu nilai yg masi blom keluar(mpkt) trus ip gw 2,89. yaudah si, bucuo lah ya. not bad. mamahuhu. ya intinya cukup lah. menurut gwww. trus gw tanya kiri kanan kan. daaaaaaan gw blom nemuin tmn skampus gw yg ipnya dibawah gw! aaaaaah! bahkan gw blom nemuin yg ipnya dibawah 3,4. aaaaahhh!!!!!!! dan itu gw nanya lintas fakultas, ga fib doang. ya mungkin gw kurang banyak bertanya. apa mungkin emg ip gw jelek taiiii. grrrrrrrrrr. trus janji gw adalah, ga ada cerita semester 2 gw masi kaya gini!!!! makanya gw udah nyusul belajar dr sekarang karena gw tau bgt ni tmn2 sejurusan gw jg pasti pada belajar dan gw ga mau masuk2 bego sendiri. vava ima, klo lo baca ini, i don't know about you two, tp liya, oris gt tu pasti belajar nyet.
dr sma gw sering gt kan tiba2 termotivasi untuk belajar. liat nilai gw jelek, termotivasi. abis di ceramahin, termotivasi. termotivasi doang tapi, ga belajar beneran. hahahahahaha. gw mikir si, gila gw cape nyet termotivasi terus, kapan majunya? motivasi tanpa perbuatan itu bagaikan iman tanpa perbuatan. bagaikan burung tanpa sayap atau biji. jadi ya gt, gw bingung kan, apa dong yg bisa bikin gw berbuat? dan ternyata br kuliah ini ketauan kalo yg bikin gw ky gini tu ya sekeliling gw! tai gw dikelilingin orang2 pinter blingsatan ky tai nilai A A semua ip 3 koma 3koma. ya gw ga bakal idup kalo ga gini.
jadi inti dari post gw adalah, iya bener apa kata orang blg, lo baru bisa maju klo dalam keadaan mendesak. hahaha. bagus2. terus desak gw sampe ip gw terancam 4. haha

aaaah taiii

i HATE it when this happens. that stupid rush of stupid feeling tai tai tai tai

wo xiang ni. parah parah paraaaaaaahhhhh

=(

at times i wish things never turned out to be this way. but then, it's all already too late and turning the time won't even change a thing.

berries

nilai mpkt gw masi blom keluar. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

udah lama ga update

sorry, lg mls ngeblog pdhl byk cerita. ni mendingan buka youtube trus search ini ni

jeff dunham

russell peters

pablo francisco

demetri martin

sorry mls ngelink jg. search aja. sumpah ya gw ntnin itu semua dr mlm ngakak2, tau2 udah jam 5 dan br bisa tidur jam 7 gara pipi gw sakit bgt abis ketawa2.

enjoy!

oh and thk u timmy udah ngasi tau south park bisa ditonton di southparkstudios.com. lengkap. huaaaaaaaa i miss kenny!

weeeee moneeeyyy

money makes people change. money makes me change. i don't even recognize myself anymore. i control money, not vice versa. i am thankful for everything that i have now and i do not greed for more. i don't EVER want to be enslaved by money. money is not everything, even though it sure is something. to me, success does not measured in dollars(and any other currency for that matter) and i really mean everything i wrote above.

i am soooooooo glad i threw that thing away. THANK YOU GOD.

tiba2 ga mood nulis serius. hahaahhah

gw maen gts aja d. sumpah gw pgnnya maen the sims tp g punya cdromnya. belom sempet beli

2009!

i'm not the type of people who actually makes new year's resolutions but what the heck, here it goes:

-ketemu jason mraz!!!

-ntn religulous!

-by the time choke is out in theaters, i have to ......... (haha, can't write it down. sorry!)

-get a new bookshelf

-dpt 100 pas tes. hahaaaaaaaa

yaudah si itu doang. gw g mood bikin dan ga mood ngejalanin. hahaha. gw lg pgn cerita kamar gw di cat ulang. uuurrggghhhh. karena kamar gw di cat, gw jd harus pindah k kamar ade gw dulu which is gelap remang2 gmn gt dan menyebabkan gw ga bisa belajar sm baca! pdhl gw pgn bgt baca dan kmrn gw udah g belajar. trus tulisan2 di tembok kamar gw itu, udah di cat! hahahahahaaha. sayang sumpah, tp yaaaaaa gmn. itu isiny memori2 lama dan agak ga penting jg si. you know, those kind of memories you want to actually throw away. haha. so yeah, seneng jg si akhirnya ketutup. eh gw lg mood nulis serius2 gmn gt d. gw bikin posting br aja d.